2 Dec 2010

Master the Art of Saying NO.

If you can master the art of saying no, your life will change dramatically.

Being responsible for everyone and everything is exhausting. Business owners often assume responsibility way beyond the call of duty, and this can become extremely stressful. A comment that I hear frequently from business owners is that they are tired of being responsible for everything to do with the business.

It doesn’t really matter though, because at the end of the day, you are responsible for everything to do with your business. The key is it is up to you how you manage this responsibility. In fact, you need to share the responsibility around and empower others to take some of it from your shoulders.

This can be a little tricky at first, especially for the business owner who has developed the habit of saying yes to everything. The most powerful tool to ease the energy drain associated with responsibility overload is learning to say no and it is something that many business owners really struggle with. Let me show you how I did it.

I do a lot of public speaking and have a relatively high profile in my home city. The problem with this is that I am frequently asked to do free speaking jobs for charities and other organisations like universities and business groups. Often when I am asked I am put on the spot.

In the past I didn’t feel that I could say no, so I didn’t. Then it felt like an extra commitment that really stressed me out and added to my already considerable workload. I always used to kick myself after I’d agreed to one of these engagements, but I didn’t know how to stop this from happening. At one stage I was spending two days a week doing “free work”. It was lucky I was doing all of this charity work because I was well and truly on the path to needing their services! I had to do something and I had to do it fast otherwise I would have a breakdown or go broke.

Now I have a system that works fantastically for me. Whenever someone asks me to speak to their organisation, whether they ask me face to face, over the phone or by email, I never commit to an engagement on the spot. I always say that I have to check my diary and other commitments first and that it might take me a day or two to get back to them.

This gives me a little breathing space to decide if it is something I can do and, more importantly, is it something I want to do? If the answer to either of these is no, I call the person back and tell them that I can’t do the event.

I can’t overstate how much pressure this has taken off me. I follow this system with virtually every request for my time in my business life. You can also develop similar habits and buffers that simply gives you room to properly consider a request on your time rather than feeling a responsibility to do commit.

Learning to say no will certainly have a major impact on the day-to-day responsibilities and demands that so often cause undue stress and prevent any form of balance in our lives. Master the art of saying no and your life will change.

If you really do struggle with the concept of saying no, I would strongly recommend that you read the book “How to Say No Without Feeling Guilty” by Patti Breitman and Connie Hatch. This book will certainly help you to overcome the impulse to say yes.

Work out a system that will work for you so that you can start to say no more often and spend more time doing the things they you want to do and that are really important to you.

Cheers,

Andrew

1. MEDIA INTERVIEW – “The importance of taking time to reflect”
It’s the perfect time to do some reflecting and take stock on the year that was. To find out more listen to my interview on 96.5FM this week – LISTEN TO INTERVIEW

2. PROFESSIONAL PRESENTERS BOOTCAMP – Click on the following link if you would like to start 2011 with a big injection of energy, new skills and new people. PROFESSIONAL PRESENTERS BOOTCAMP – FEB 3, 2011