This week I have decided to talk about business/life balance because it is a topic I am getting a lot of questions about. Last year it was all about the GFC, now there are positive signs that the future is brighter and many business owners are stopping to take a breath and suddenly realising they are fatigued and feeling fried. This is an important topic and I will do a few BULLETS around in the coming week.
So how do we get out of balance in the first place?
Ironically, we get out of balance by trying to do what we think is right. We work hard, we commit completely to our businesses, we argue that to succeed we need to be devoted to growing the business, especially in the early stages, and, most significantly, we are energised and excited about the future.
Over time we get busier, our responsibilities grow and our needs and expectations are overtaken by the needs and expectations that others have of us. Then the feeling of being overwhelmed starts to move in.
The better you are at what you do, the more likely you are to start feeling overwhelmed, because more people want what it is you are selling. As your business grows there are more staff, more customers, more suppliers, bigger sums of money to manage and generally more paperwork to contend with. So in some ways, feeling out of balance with your business and your life is a reflection of the fact that you are great at what you do, take it as a compliment.
But before you get too carried away with patting yourself on the back and being proud that your life is completely out of control, remember that as your business has grown, you have had to learn a host of new skills to deal with this growth. Learning how to have a business and a life is just another set of skills that need to be learned along the way.
There are two ways to deal with being out of balance. The first is to change yourself and your perceptions. The second is to change your circumstances. Most likely both will be necessary. However you look at it, there must be a constant and ongoing commitment to do what is best for you, and the courage to create the necessary changes, so that you are honouring yourself, the people in your life, and the planet.
What are the long-term effects of being out of balance?
I can attest to the long-term effects of having a life out of balance and they aren’t pretty. The effects on health are the most noticeable, generally starting with headaches, skin conditions and an upset stomach, often accompanied by a general feeling of being unwell. Some people have a permanent cold or flu, get bags under their eyes or start to hear the comment, ‘Gee, you look tired’, a lot more often.
Along with the physical symptoms come the emotional ones. We start to get more irritable, we don’t sleep as well as we used to, perhaps we start to get anxiety and even panic attacks, and we are irritable and generally highly strung.
Under these conditions we can find ourselves leaning on crutches in the form of drugs and alcohol: after work we start to have three or four drinks to wind down; maybe we have three or four cups of coffee to get going in the morning. We eat chocolate to perk us up, which we need often because we have no energy, but which causes us to put on weight.
Without making conscious decisions to change, and without knowing how to change, things will only get worse. Of course, the longer you have bad habits, the harder they are to change and the more damage they can do. Business owners often tend to struggle the most with establishing a fitness and health regime, simply because they don’t give themselves enough time or energy to focus on it. Someone who has a regular job generally has a start time and a knock-off time, and can more easily build a fitness program into their life.
What do you need to do right now to change the way things are?
Any change needs commitment. If you are desperate to make an improvement to your situation then you probably have the right amount of motivation. Without the right amount of motivation any change will be minimal and in all likelihood it won’t last.
So right here, right now, you need to stop and think about just how important it is that you introduce some real changes to your life that will stop the feeling of being overwhelmed, and help you to start to take control of both your business and your life.
Think about how you want to feel, what it is that you want to do with your time, how you want to look, how you want to act and how you want to live your life. Once you are clear on this, or at least willing to start really looking at each aspect of your life, you can move on.
Remember that this is a journey—but it’s not an overnight journey; it’s about changing virtually every aspect of your life so that you can really get the most out of the years ahead. So there may be some pain, other people may not like the changes that you need to make, especially in the short term, and some may even try to sabotage the process (people generally don’t like change, especially in those closest to them). This is where you need to be strong, dedicated and very clear on where it is you are heading.
Until next week,
Andrew
PS Many thanks for the people who sent me lovely emails regarding my interview on Sunrise. I was also recently interviewed by MINDFOOD Magazine – an excellent publication covering everything from personal development to health and well being and even some seriously good recipes. It is also a very good publication to help with Work/Life balance. If you would like to read this article click on this link – MINDFOOD ARTICLE.
PPS And for those of you in Sydney, I will be going into the Triple M studios this week to do a live interview on Wednesday around 10.30am.
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